WHY AWFUL CLIENTS ARE GREAT FOR YOUR BUSINESS.

Awful clients.

The ones that want you to give them everything, at the highest quality, but then nickel & dime the budget. The ones that hire you to do a job but don't trust you to actually DO the job. The ones who won't acknowledge that they don't know what the hell they want. The I-already-know-how-this-works-because-I've done-this-before people (except that they don't know how it works) and the can-you-do-it for-cheaper? folks. Ridiculous turnaround times, unrealistic expectations, clients who think they can do your job better than you, & clients who just want to use you for your resources--these folks can quickly become an entrepreneur's worst nightmare.

Whether you're a Photographer, Graphic Designer, Personal Trainer, Copywriter, Fashion Stylist, Videographer, Baker, Producer, PR guru, Interior Designer or any other kind of creative business owner, you'll probably encounter one of these people at some point during the life of your business. Do I hope that they never--EVER--cross your path? Of course. But the reality is that they probably WILL show up along your entrepreneurial journey because they're there to teach you how to show up more fully in your business. Knowing them will raise your blood pressure, create tons of physical stress & almost make you were sitting in an office cubicle instead of crafting a career you love...but these people can be really great for your business if you can learn what they're really trying to teach you.Let me explain.

Over the course of my 5.5 years in design, I've probably had 3 clients who I'd put in the no-matter-what-happens-please-absolutely-never-ever-call-my-line-again category. Some as recently as 2015. With two of the projects there came a point where I thought, "there's not enough money you could pay me that would make this a pleasant-enough experience to continue"--too many changes to the scope, too many fluxuations in the budget & not enough trust to execute the project in a way that would make this collaborative design process fun. And for awhile I did what we normally do in these cases--complain to family & close friends about what an absolute hemorrhoid these people had become. But that quickly got old. And I knew deep down that they weren't just there to get on my nerves but that they (and my experiences with them) could teach me something, if I changed my perspective.Because all the "awful clients" are really doing is showing you where you need to "tighten up" in your biz--where you need to be more specific in your contracts, raise your prices, eliminate some services or set clearer personal & professional boundaries.

So I did. And here's what I realized: that in the beginning of my career, as a fresh & bright-eyed designer, I'd constructed an ideal client profile that consisted of something like this: Good eye.Great budget. And that was pretty much it. What I most wanted were clients with a good eye for design who'd let me execute my vision + a sufficient-enough budget ($10k & up) with which to execute said design. They should "benice", "be cool" and "be flexible". And when I found those people, I was straight up overjoyed. But now that I've had time to develop as a designer, expand my professional interests, work with a variety of clients & grow as a person (read: I've acquired some skin in the game),that short list doesn't cut it anymore.Not if I intend to continue doing work I love, for people I love working with.

Here's the invaluable insight The Awfuls have helped me realize: I'm no longer willing to settle for clients with just "good money & good style" and I can no longer focus on the traditional quantitative demographics like age, education level, marital status, family makeup & income level to identify the people I most want to work with(categories we entrepreneurs are traditionally taught to use). Instead, I've shifted to a Values-Based Client Profilewhich means I care more about WHO my clients are and what THEY value then what they're bringing to the table.TheAwfuls have schooled me on this:  My ideal/targeted clients are people with a high level of personal integrity--ones who take responsibility for their behavior. They're people who value my time as a professional & who understand that Interior Design is a professional luxury service. These people trust the process of design and understand that there's no one size fits all design approach. My ideal clients believe in the importance of self-care & view the creation of a beautiful home as an extension of their well-being. They communicate authentically, are decisive, have a great sense of humor & genuinely want to work with a designer. Do I still want them to have a stylish eye & enough of a budget to execute their wishes? Absolutely. But I don't worry about those things because they're encompassed within the values/standards I set regarding the people I want to work with. Because someone who understands that Interior Design is a professional luxury service would never belittle me or themselves by asking me to render a service for less than it's value. Someone who really wants to work with a designer will give me the freedom & trust to work my magic and create something jaw dropping for them. Someone with a high level of personal integrity is honest about their budget upfront. See what I mean?

Here's another example: If you're an "artisanal croissant maker", your client is not "anyone who can afford $2.25 for a piece of bread". It's someone who LOVES a delicious buttery & flakey croissant. Someone who will find a bakeshop they love & drive 20 minutes clear across town on a Sunday morning to read the New York Times & have a croissant because it's their "thing"--an act of self-love. It's someone who believes in the value of knowing where their food comes from. High quality butter.Locally grown ingredients. Developing relationships with the people who make their food. A person who believes that not just anyone can make "good bread".  If you're a croissant artisan or specialty bread maker, your clients are not "anybody who will buy a croissant"--you want the people who appreciate the value of the service you're providing. And if you really love what you do, you should want the same thing, too.

I'm not implying that when you encounter The Awfuls that it automatically means you need better people--that was just one of my lessons. I've also learned that if I have a misunderstanding with a client it's probably a sign that I need to update my contract & make sure the major details are in writing. And I've learned that I needed to stop giving clients discounts that they didn't ask for because giving without explaining the true value of the discount means they won't understand the value of the service they're receiving. And because of that, they will ride me bareback (not to mention that clients who want a discount should AT LEAST have the balls to ask for one).  Because I've had the ability to create my own path, I intend to work with the kind of people I genuinely want to be around. Think about these questions with regard to your biz: For whom are you making your product? How do you want your clients to interact with YOU? Who do you want them to be in their personal lives? What does investing in your product mean that they value?? I NEVER would this kind of clarity about my business & my tribe if it hadn't been for The Awfuls. When I got fed up enough & realized I never wanted to work with those kind of people again, it gave me the push to figure out the kind of people I DO want to work with, which has made all the difference. And it's also why I don't really believe in "awful clients"--I just see them as the guides who show us where we aren't in alignment with who we really are & what we really want. All they're really here to do is point you towards greater happiness....so acknowledge what you need to change & go change it. 'Cause your best work is still waiting for you.

TIPS FOR TRAVELING SOLO INTERNATIONALLY LIKE A BAD ASS

Embarking on a solo adventure clear across the world is one of the most exciting things you can do for your personal growth. It's okay to feel a little nervous but if you're thinking about booking a jaunt of your own, don't let fear keep you from sealing the deal! Part of the reason that I was able to successfully travel to Istanbul alone is because I made sure to take as many safety precautions as I could up front so I could travel with peace of mind (mostly). ;-) Fresh from my trip here are my tips on how to make the best of your solo international excursion and travel like the bad ass you are!

1. Register with the US Embassy. I've traveled out of the country before and never done this prior to my trip to Istanbul because I was always traveling with a partner or meeting someone at my destination. Traveling alone, however, is another story and this tip is especially important if you're traveling alone. In the event of an emergency, registering with the US Embassy at your destination lets the officials know that a US citizen is in the country and helps them quickly & easily notify you/your family in the event of an emergency (natural disaster, etc.) through the STEP program (Smart Travel Enrollment Program). Sure, emergencies don't happen very often but when they do, it's good to know that someone knows where to find you ASAP. If you have any issues while you're traveling, always call the embassy. And make sure to check the current travel warnings for your destination city prior to departure.
2. Always carry a written copy of the phone number and address number to where you are staying. Phones die. Break. Get lost/are stolen. Fall in the ocean while on a ferry boat. Think ahead and make sure you have directions with you in a safe place somewhere outside of your phone. This tip especially comes in handy when you're staying at an Air BNB versus a local hotel. This didn't occur to me until I was out in the street and taxi drivers wanted to know where I was staying--I couldn't just say the name of a hotel (because I wasn't staying there!) and I couldn't pronounce the long names of the streets nearest to where I was staying. Luckily, upon my arrival my host handed me a business card that had all of the information I needed to contact him. Each night that card was my lifeline to get home so I always made sure to have it in my purse at all times (write down the number/address to the Embassy as well!).
3. If you get lost/need a taxi/need a translator, head to your nearest hotel. Most hotels cater to tourists so this is a great place to stop if you're out in the streets and need assistance--you'll almost always be sure to find someone who speaks English behind the front desk as well.  My first night in Istanbul I "randomly" met a front desk attendant standing outside of his hotel who mentioned that if I ever needed a taxi, I could come back and he would get one for me. Not 15 minutes later I found myself having a hard time getting taxi drivers to agree to take me to the address on the card, so I went back to that hotel and Mehmet walked me across the street to a taxi and told the driver where I needed to go (in much better Turkish than I ever could've managed). Due to his central location (& friendly nature) he quickly became an asset (and a friend!) throughout the duration my trip. Nothing is random, of course.

5. Don't underestimate a smile. Especially when you're in a country where few people speak English. While in Turkey I encountered a lot of people who outright stared at me--blank, unemotional face and all. It made me super uncomfortable at first, then after a few days I started to think more about how MY face was looking to them. And I know that people were looking at me because I look different that what they're used to--from my brown skin, to my long braided hair, to the fact that I was traveling alone--and it occurred that they were looking at me because they were curious. Remember on Instagram when I mentioned being accosted by a group of moms to take pictures with their kids outside of Sultanahmet (Blue Mosque)? That all happened because I saw the young girls & their mom continuously staring at me. After I offered a smile (and pointed to my hair), the little girl nodded and a huge smile spread across her face. They didn't speak English at all but I was able to gather that they wanted to have their picture taken with me, so I obliged them. All because I broke the ice with a smile. It was interesting to see how many people appeared more welcoming after I smiled or gave a wave so don't underestimate the power of a smile. Be who you want to encounter. 
6. Always carry a portable charger. Always. There is nothing worse than being out in the streets, in a foreign country, with a dying battery on your phone. It's a huge safety no-no and if you're using your phone as your camera--like I was--it's a total nightmare when your phone dies and you have no way to capture those once in a lifetime memories!  Even when you're in the US, a portable charger is a god-send when your phone gets low and you find yourself without a USB cord.  Let's face it--there's just need to be walking around with a dead phone these days....unless, of course, you want to.

7. Learn a few basic words/phrases in the local language. This is something I should've done but didn't. Traveling to a country where I had zero experience with the local language (Turkish), it became apparent that failing to learn even the most basic phrases is actually a bit inconsiderate & rude. It doesn't help that there's often a perception of Americans that we travel with the expectation that everyone should know English wherever we are--which I witnessed with my own eyes. If I could even fix my lips to say I spoke a second language it would be Spanish--the pronunciation of which is much easier to me than Turkish--so I made an assumption that I could just learn the language on the go but that wasn't the case. Be a courteous traveler & teach yourself how to say a few words in the local language like hello, goodbye, good morning, thank you, and maybe even how to ask for help. Even if your pronunciation isn't 100%, the gesture will be appreciated & you'll find it incredibly handy as you navigate your travels. 
8. Take advantage of the disconnect. By far, one of the unintended highlights of my trip was the fact that my phone only worked as long as I was connected to WiFi. This meant that when I was out during the day, I didn't have access to ANY social media so I couldn't peruse Facebook while my taxi driver drove me home, check Instagram as I rode the Metro through the city or text message my friends while I waited for my breakfast/lunch/dinner to arrive. And you know what happened when I didn't have my face in my phone every 15 seconds? I paid attention.And interacted with strangers.And met an incredible Spelman sister on a random street corner, all because I was being present. It gave me time to think about my next steps, reflect on my business and really absorb the culture of the city in an uninterrupted manner. One of the main points of vacationing by yourself is to be WITH yourself--not constantly checking in with everything that's going on back home (the place you're supposed to be taking break from). You're the best company you'll ever have, so take advantage of it as much as you can.
9. Book a food tour.  One of the best ways to learn about a country/culture is through its food and if you can only book one tour on your trip, consider making it a food tour or cooking class. During my 5 hour tour with Turkish Flavours I tasted all kinds incredible local Turkish cuisine and was able to experience the city in a way I wouldn't have been able to on my own. A food tour is also a great way to see how the locals live as your guide will often take you through markets in neighborhoods filled with residents doing their everyday shopping. An added bonus? Because these markets are often off the beaten path it will translate into better deals for you! During my tour of the Asian side of Istanbul I scored a Pink Himalayan Salt Bar for $3TL which equals about $1.07 USD. 2 days later I bought the same bar from the Spice Market--a tourist area--for $10TL ($3.57 USD) which is still a deal but.....I'd much rather pay $1. Next time I return I'll know exactly where to go!

10. Bring a ring. If you're a woman traveling alone, consider bringing a faux wedding ring along for the journey. Even if it's a basic gold washer from the hardware store that can do double duty as a wedding band, buy it & carry it in your purse at all times. You don't have to wear it (or can take it off whenever you need) but it's ALWAYS good to have. I can't tell you how many people--especially men--wanted to know where my husband/friends were and if I was traveling alone. After awhile I just started telling people that I was meeting a friend at another location because it occurred to me that I could be unintentionally making myself a target. Most of the time it was just innocent inquisitive conversation but there a few conversations, particularly with 1 cab driver, that got my antenna up and had me thinking that a ring would be a great thing to have. Leave the feminist pride at home and, if someone asks and you feel uncomfortable/don't want their attention, tell them you are married. With kids. There are still a lot of places in the world where this means something, and it was my experience that the men would back off immediately.
11. Use cash if you can. Swiping your card in foreign lands makes you much more susceptible to fraud while away so use cash whenever possible. Depending on the exchange rate, start out with about $300 USD you can exchange at the airport, then use a local ATM to take out cash as needed. Not only does dealing with cash help you keep track of your spending but if you bank with Chase (like I do) they'll refund all foreign transaction fees incurred at an ATM once you return stateside.  Keep in mind that they can't do this for POS (point of sale) transactions, as the fee is added into the charge, so in this case using cash can actually save you money. Not a Chase customer? It's worth a trip to your branch to find out if they'll extend this courtesy to you as well.
12. Find a mall. Yup, I'm serious. It seems basic and very "American", but if you're like me and enjoy seeing how the locals live, the mall can be a great place to visit. You'll get a chance to tour the city en route to your destination, experience local architecture, see retail brands we probably don't have here in the US and it's always a safe bet for the days when your plans didn't turn out like you expected. Not to mention, malls are generally safe places for solo travelers.
13. Take pictures. Of yourself, yes, but consider taking pictures for other people as well--I must've taken at least 40 pictures for strangers while I was in Istanbul. As I toured different areas I constantly saw couples alternating taking pictures of each other in front of special sites, entire families trying to fit in a picture on a selfie stick or even a few solo travelers who looked like they really wanted their picture taken but were afraid to ask. Were there language barriers? Absolutely. But one thing you'll find about offering to do something nice for others--no matter what language they speak, your kind gesture won't go unnoticed. Everyone was so grateful that I offered to take their picture (and took several at that!)...it felt good to know that such a small gesture on my part could help people memorialize a special moment/trip.

14. Give yourself permission to feel scared. Feeling scared is only a feeling (which doesn't make it true!) and it's only natural--you're in a new land where you don't speak the language with zero friends, navigating your way on your own. It's unrealistic to expect that you'll feel comfortable all of the time....plus, traveling alone inherently means you're bound to be a bit uncomfortable in the process so just lean in! Learning how to navigate on your own will give you a new level of self-confidence that just can't come any other way....and it will also make you mindful of how much we all tend to default to sticking to our comfort zones in our daily lives. Take this time to consciously stretch your limits & live a little! You'll never, EVER, regret spending money on an experience that honors the core of who you are. 

Happy Traveling!